Asha Frost - Tuesday, August 10, 2010

From the Anishinaabe understanding, Humility is to know yourself as a Sacred part of Creation. In my life, I am constantly inspired by the humble people that surround me. Those who are deeply connected to their light source and beautifully shine this without the need to boast or prove who they are. I am lucky enough to have this teaching modelled to me in my dear friends and colleagues and strive to reflect this teaching back to the earth as I learn and grow.

It occurred to me today how I have been resisting fully embracing this teaching. Recently, an article was written about my work in the local paper. After the interview, I was unsure as to how the information would be interpreted and expressed. I had no idea that the writer would focus on my own healing journey with Lupus and when I read it, there was this sudden panic that now this information was "out there".

My healing journey is not something I necessarily hide, but it is not revealed to many. Upon deeper examination, I realized that there is this expectation that I have placed upon myself that I must be completely healed to facilitate healing. I understand that there is consciousness around us all being on a healing journey, that none of us are completely "healed". However, with a physical illness it is much more evident. There is physical evidence that my wounds are not healed. At my most self-critical, harsh place, it feels like I am not or have not done enough.

And now...this was revealed to the community at large.

The breaking down begins.

Breaking down of old belief systems that I have been holding so tightly. That, somehow, I am not perfect because I struggle with this dis "ease". That I have to keep pushing myself even though my body is tired and achy and in pain. That I am not entitled to rest and take time for myself. I know it sounds crazy from the outside, but alas, it is one of my deepest, most profound issues to heal.

A healer had once asked me if I felt that I deserved Abundance. We went through a check list of sorts. Money - yes. Business success - yes. Love - yes. Friendships - yes. Health...


Do I deserve good health? Logically yes, but do my spirit and body agree? No. He was a good tracker. This was a key wound.

A few nights ago, I was away at a magical cottage with two very dear friends and colleagues. It was such a gift to spend time with these women taking in nature and honouring ourselves with rest and fun. As these precious beings are very intuitive and gifted, they could tell that I was suffering and offered me healing, even though it was close to midnight!

The breakdown started. I could literally feel all of my defenses and barriers blasting apart. Tears started to flow with the simple suggestion that they could offer me some healing. To accept would mean that I need help. And, indeed, I needed help. I realized, in that moment, that it takes a humble person to admit they need help. Yes, I book appointments with other practitioners and do my own healing work, but in the moments that seem the darkest...when I feel like I cannot do this any longer, exist in this world in this state - can I ask for help? In that moment, the answer was yes.

A teaching in humility.

A beautiful healing followed and I understood on a deeper level that I am, indeed a Sacred part of Creation. I deserve rest and healing. I deserve goodness in this lifetime. I deserve health. Health is at the forefront of this abundance that I am intending on manifesting.I am aware that part of sharing this is part of the ego and resistance breaking down. We are all human. We are all here learning from our most difficult experiences and one another and doing our very best.

In these moments of awareness Swan medicine stepped forward:

"Allow yourself to surrender to the moment, release all struggle. Be kind to your heart and gentle to your body. Forgive yourself for all of the times you have made mistakes, for you are a beautiful human being."

From these words, I set the intention to walk with grace and humility each and every day. And when I fall off the path, I know that there are many people who surround me to call me back. To remind me of what I deserve.

Spirit also calls me back.

The other night, at the magical cottage, we witnessed more shooting stars than I could have ever wished to see in one night. The Star People were speaking to my soul. They reminded me that we have the potential to illuminate our lives with joy, magic, unconditional love and a healed body. Miracles all around. I trust this with all of my heart. My body is simply taking time to catch up.

I am a Sacred Part of Divine Creation. We all are. I hold in my heart that all of my loved ones and clients see this in themselves as I hold in my heart for me to see it in myself.

And then tonight, in a purely human moment of eating Chinese Food - the perfect message came from a fortune cookie:

"Good health will be yours for a long time."


A. xo


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